My place in the kingdom

This post is aimed mostly at other Christians. Anyone is welcome, but not all will know what I mean.

 

As a woman. A princess. A daughter of the King. Part of the church. One of the Bride of Christ. Loved. Valued. Jesus died for me as well.

But totally at a loss in this world today.

I spoke in front of my church last year. Some of my girl friends still do. But in the last few months, I have been so frustrated. With Scripture verses. Society. My place. Authority.

1 Corinthians 13:something says that women should not speak in the church. Yet, what about Paul mentioning women accompanying him in his ministry? 

I asked at my church about the verse, but I didn’t get any scripture based answers that really answered what I was asking.  I don’t want to be misled to protect some modern worldview. I want to follow God whether that means my dreams for the future are what He wants or not. I’ll gladly change them. God has been too good to me for anything less.

I know God has no blame, but that doesn’t mean I understand.

If anyone has any thought to add, or knows of any writers that really go deep into this subject, write on.

Just some of the things that have added to the confusion:

Esther, Ruth, Deborah, Eve, Old Testament vs. New Testament, Judges, and on and on.

I’m not really on the verge of a breakdown here. I mean, if what God expects from me is to keep quiet, live a Godly life, and spend my time focusing on other women and children, that is a pretty tall order in itself. I’m not complaining about what He has for me. I’m more groaning about the possibility that I’ve been misled thus far, and that all of my current way of living is off course.

 

Please help

After a night of talking with Ken and Johnny, I went over to Katy’s house so we could finish The Fracture(very good, very clever, Anthony Hopkins is the man…) and Katy let the room to go hang out with her dad. I was laying in her bed, thinking about the movie and the night, and I kept coming back to this verse, 1 Corinthians 13. A beautiful and inspiring chapter about the signifigance of love, what love is, etc.

Earlier that night, I felt like I should get up and share that chapter with everyone, you know, because it was Valentine’s Day and all. But as John finished everyone was pretty restless already so I didn’t want to be a pain and I decided not to.

So I was thinking about that verse. I love it. It’s my battlecry. So I grabbed Katy’s Bible off the shelf to read it again.

I got caught up in Paul’s words. I kept reading past it. And I came to a verse that I had never noticed before: 1 Corinthians 14:34-37:

34     Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law.35     And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.36     What? came the word of God out from you? or came it unto you only?37     If any man think himself to be a prophet, or spiritual, let him acknowledge that the things that I write unto you are the commandments of the Lord.

 At first, I was shocked. I’m still shocked. So this is where the women can’t be preachers idea comes from.

 I am finding this hard to swallow. I feel heartbroken and let down. Why would God want half us His children to not be allowed to open their mouths in the most important place of their lives? Doesn’t churches mean any gathering of believers? So I can never talk to another believer, I just have to listen to what men say. I can’t ask questions. I’m supposed to ask my husband. I don’t even have a husband!

I feel so confused, lost, heartbroken, about this.

So I can’t have the amazing, eye opening talks with Ken anymore? I have understood so much through that!

Election

Any Christ followers want to read what just blew my mind?

Check out election in the Bible. Has anyone else ever heard of this concept? It attempts to answer a question I’ve had. Rather, it likely answers it, but I’m still struggling to wrap my head around the implications.

Basically, I’ve always wondered about whether God decides who believes and who doesn’t, and what it means. (If that sentence was confusing but familiar, me too.)

http://www.biblebelievers.net/Calvinism/kjcelect.htm.

Jesus is the way.  Every bit of meaning in life comes from Him. 

Also, I’ve just discovered probably one of the most touching verses I’ve ever read. Lots of people have heard the verse “Love is patient, love is kind(1 Corinthians 13:4)…,” but this is the first time I’ve read the whole section. 1 Corinthians 13. Ladies and gentlemen, I’ve found my Battlecry.

1 Corinthians 13

 1 I may speak in different languages^[a] of people or even angels. But if I do not have love, I am only a noisy bell or a crashing cymbal. 2 I may have the gift of prophecy. I may understand all the secret things of God and have all knowledge, and I may have faith so great I can move mountains. But even with all these things, if I do not have love, then I am nothing. 3 I may give away everything I have, and I may even give my body as an offering to be burned.^[b] But I gain nothing if I do not have love.

 4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud.5 Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not get upset with others. Love does not count up wrongs that have been done. 6 Love takes no pleasure in evil but rejoices over the truth. 7 Love patiently accepts all things. It always trusts, always hopes, and always endures.

 8 Love never ends. There are gifts of prophecy, but they will be ended. There are gifts of speaking in different languages, but those gifts will stop. There is the gift of knowledge, but it will come to an end.9 The reason is that our knowledge and our ability to prophesy are not perfect.10 But when perfection comes, the things that are not perfect will end.11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I stopped those childish ways.12 It is the same with us. Now we see a dim reflection, as if we were looking into a mirror, but then we shall see clearly. Now I know only a part, but then I will know fully, as God has known me.13 So these three things continue forever: faith, hope, and love. And the greatest of these is love.

Urgency

I feel so urgent. I feel like I have much less time to tell you all about Jesus than I thought.

Listen to me: Jesus loves all of you.

Even if you don’t want to hear it, you need to hear it!

Christ died for us, the gift is free, He loves you, and He’s coming back!

Please, grab everyone you can and accept Christ as your savior.

You don’t have forever, and you never know where you are going to be tomorrow.

You don’t have to reject Him! You don’t have to face judgment!

Your sins have been paid for!

I love you all!

I got this from a friend of a friend.

In Genesis, He is the Creator God.
In Exodus, He is the Redeemer.
In Leviticus, He is your sanctification.
In Numbers, He is your guide.
In Deuteronomy, He is your teacher.
In Joshua, He is the mighty conqueror.
In Judges, He gives victory over enemies.
In Ruth, He is your kinsman, your lover, your redeemer.
In I Samuel, he is the root of Jesse;
In 2 Samuel, He is the Son of David.
In 1 Kings and 2 Kings, He is King of Kings and Lord of Lords.
In 1st and 2nd Chronicles, He is your intercessor and High Priest.
In Ezra, He is your temple, your house of worship.
In Nehemiah, He is your mighty wall, protecting you from your enemies.
In Esther, He stands in the gap to deliver you from your enemies.
In Job, He is the arbitrator who not only understands your struggles, but has the power to do something about them.
In Psalms, He is your song-and your reason to sing.
In Proverbs, He is your wisdom, helping you make sense of life and live it successfully.
In Ecclesiastes, He is your purpose, delivering you from vanity.
In the Song of Solomon, He is your lover, your Rose of Sharon.
In Isaiah, He is the mighty counselor, the prince of peace, the everlasting father, and more. In short, He’s everything you need.
In Jeremiah, He is your balm of Gilead, the soothing salve for your sin-sick soul.
In Lamentations, He is the ever-faithful one upon whom you can depend.
In Ezekiel, He is your wheel in the middle of a wheel - the one who assures that dry, dead bones will come alive again.
In Daniel, He is the ancient of days, the everlasting God who never runs out of time.
In Hosea, He is your faithful lover, always beckoning you to come back-even when you have abandoned Him.
In Joel, He is your refuge, keeping you safe in times of trouble.
In Amos, He is the husbandman, the one you can depend on to stay by your side.
In Obadiah, He is Lord of the Kingdom.
In Jonah, He is your salvation, bringing you back within His will.
In Micah, He is judge of the nation.
In Nahum, He is the jealous God.
In Habakkuk, He is the Holy One.
In Zephaniah, He is the witness.
In Haggai, He overthrows the enemies.
In Zechariah, He is Lord of Hosts.
In Malachi, He is the messenger God.
In Matthew, He is king of the Jews.
In Mark, He is the servant.
In Luke, He is the Son of Man, feeling what you feel.
In John, He is the Son of God.
In Acts, He is Savior of the world.
In Romans, He is the righteousness of God.
In I Corinthians, He is the rock that followed Israel.
In II Corinthians, He is the triumphant one, giving victory.
In Galatians, He is your liberty; He sets you free.
In Ephesians, He is head of the Church.
In Philippians, He is your joy.
In Colossians, He is your completeness.
In I Thessalonians, He is your hope.
In II Thessalonians, He is your patience and discipline.
In I Timothy, He is your faith.
In II Timothy, He is your stability.
In Titus, He is the truth.
In Philemon, He is your benefactor.
In Hebrews, He is your perfection.
In James, He is the power behind your faith.
In I Peter, He is your example.
In II Peter, He is your purity.
In I John, He is your life.
In II John, He is your pattern.
In III John, He is your motivation.
In Jude, He is the foundation of your faith.
In the Revelation, He is your coming King.From the beginning of the world to its end, there is no place you can look and not see Jesus. He is everywhere. He is everything.”He is before all things, and by Him all things consist.”- Colossians 1:17

I feel…content

Sleep deprived, cold, doubt ridden, officially broke again, sore throat, too busy, unworthy.

But guess what? I have Jesus. Everything’s good. You can’t touch that.

You know what? The world is rough. Some days do tear at me.

But I can rest in the arms of my savior.

He is powerful, and He will not desert me.

A love letter

My child,You may not know me, but I know everything about you (Psalm 139:1). I know when you sit down and when you rise up(Psalm 139:2), I am familiar with your ways (Psalm 139:3), even the very hairs on your head are numbered (Matt 10:29-31). For you were made in my image (Genesis 1:27). In me you live and move and have your being (Acts 17:28), for you are my offspring (Acts 17:28).I knew you even before you were conceived (Jeremiah 1:4-5). I chose you when I planned creation (Ephesians 1:11-12), You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book(Psalm 139:15-16). I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live (Acts 17:26). You were fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), I knit you together in your mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13), and brought you forth on the day you were born (Psalm 71:6).

I have been misrepresented by those who don’t know me (John 8:41-44) I am not distant and angry, but I am the complete expression of love (1 John 4:16) and it is my desire to lavish my love on you. (1 John 3:1) Simply because you are my child and I am your Father (1 John 3:1) I offer you more than your earthly father ever could (Matthew 7:11) For I am the perfect father (Matthew 5:4 Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand (James 1:17) For I am your provider and I meet all your needs (Matthew 6:31-33)

My plan for your future has always been filled with hope. (Jeremiah 29:11) Because I love you with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3) My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore (Psalms 139:17-1 And I rejoice over you with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17) I will never stop doing good to you (Jeremiah 32:40) For you are my treasured possession (Exodus 19:5) I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul (Jeremiah 32:41)

And I want to show you great and marvelous things (Jeremiah 33:3) If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me (Deuteronomy 4:29) Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4)
For it is I who gave you those desires (Philippians 2:13)

I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine (Ephesians 3:20) For I am your greatest encourager (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17) I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles (2 Corinthians 1:3-4) When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you (Psalm 34:1 As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart (Isaiah 40:11)

One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes (Revelation 21:3-4) And I’ll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth (Revelation 21:3-4) I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus (John 17:23) For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed (John 17:26) He is the exact representation of my being (Hebrews 1:3) He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you (Romans 8:31) And to tell you that I am not counting your sins (2 Corinthians 5:18-19)

Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled (2 Corinthians 5:18-19)
His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you (1 John 4:10)
I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love (Romans 8:31-32) If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me (1 John 2:23) And nothing will ever separate you from my love again (Romans 8:38-39)

Come home and I’ll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen (Luke 15:7) I have always been Father, and will always be Father (Ephesians 3:14-15)

My question is, will you be my child? (John 1:12-13)
I am waiting for you (Luke 15:11-32)

Love,
Your Dad. Almighty God

If it was longer than the twinkling of an eye

Forrest and I will be walking to the store on Main St. Just talking. About God. About a movie. About a friend. Anything.

And then we’ll hear it. The most beautiful thing you could ever imagine.

Our ears are completely monopolized by the sound of that heavenly trumpet sounding through that moment.

Forrest will be grinning from ear to ear. He knows what this means.

With tears of pure joy in my eyes, I’ll plainly state “He’s back.”

Ecclesiastes 3:11

“He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.”

Check out the middle of that. That sums me up. God has put eternity in my heart. There is no going back. I have found that there is a God, and anything less is unfathomable. I will cling to Him with all I have. I will seek Him till the day I die. I have no purpose except in Him. I am a doubter, a skeptic, yet I will commit. This world, this life, is nothing without my God. Eternity is in my heart. I surrender.